Let’s Talk About Male Birth Control. Study Finds Couples With Vasectomies Have More Sex.
Here's my story and what you can learn from it.
It was only a few minutes after the news broke that Texas was passing a strict abortion ban that I felt my heart sink. It was September 1st, 2021.
No matter what the nuances of your views on abortion might be, I think it’s safe to say most of us agree that abortion bans that do not permit exceptions for cases of rape and incest are horrific.
And even people who believe abortions shouldn’t be totally unrestricted usually believe that banning abortions in cases where the mother will die is excessive.
I turned to the internet and started searching for doctors. Within two hours, I’d already scheduled my vasectomy for a few weeks later, on September 30th.
I knew it was only a matter of time before Florida signed their own abortion ban into law. And that’s exactly what we did.
In April, Florida Governor Ron DeSantis signed a bill that doesn’t ban abortions. The bill severely restricts them, unlike the “trigger laws” that are waiting for the Supreme Court of the United States to give the green light and allow states to ban abortion altogether in all cases.
Now, the Supreme Court of the United States has signaled its willingness to overturn the two cornerstones of abortion protection in the United States, Roe Vs. Wade and Planned Parenthood Vs. Casey. If the Supreme Court decides to overturn these protections, it will happen next month.
The Growing Pains of Pregnancy
The fear of pregnancy, the pains of childbirth, and the sickness and potential side effects of hormonal birth control are things men don’t ever have to deal with.
We don’t have to worry about women leaving us after getting us pregnant with a baby, one we must fearfully carry in our stomachs for nine long months while stressing about how we’re going to survive.
It costs $30,000 just to care for pregnancy from fertilization to viable birth.
The average price of delivering a baby in a hospital is $10,808 — and that’s just the average.
The average rent in Los Angeles is $2,661. But that’s just an average. You can find rental properties for $39,900 per month. There’s no guarantee you’ll pay the average, and millions of people pay much more.
Not once in my life have these thoughts entered my mind.
This doesn’t mean that abortion doesn’t affect men. It does. My friend David is a perfect example. He was forced to watch his girlfriend carry a baby to term that had zero chance of surviving by the third month of pregnancy.
Personally, I have no shame in admitting the possibility of future child support payments terrified me in the past.
It’s enough to make a man shudder.
It’s also something I no longer have to worry about.
I chose to act and take responsibility for my own reproductive health. As a man, and I’ve got to say, it’s one of the best decisions I’ve ever made — and I’m not alone. Countless men feel the same way, and science has shown that having a vasectomy can enhance your sex life in some wonderful ways.
The Procedure
It took me about two hours to secure a place to get my vasectomy. Almost everywhere in America, there are places where you can get vasectomies for discounted or even free if you don’t make a lot of money. It takes some diligence and searching, but it’s possible.
The place I signed up for was offering a heavily discounted price for men willing to get the snip (by a thirty-year veteran doctor) while a newly licensed doctor sat in on the procedure. I’d have to wait two months for that, and I was impatient.
I waited patiently. Then judgment day came.
Most men I’ve talked to about vasectomies were almost phobic when I brought it up. Not me. I was excited.
My view was clear. I was seeing through the lens of certainty, thinking to myself…
“And with this minor inconvenience, I will never have to worry about the possibility of child support ever again…”
Try those goggles on, for a moment, fellas. Trust me, the view is great.
The place I went offers non-invasive anesthetics — no needles. They just spray a local anesthetic on your — ehem — manhood, and within a few minutes, you’re ready to go. The whole procedure only took about fifteen minutes, and you’re damn right, I recorded everything on video while the surgeon did his dirty work.
The doctor employed a “triple protection” method that ensured no hiccups later on. After you get the vasectomy, you must wait about two months and twenty ejaculations before you can be tested.
After the wait, I had to send them a sample just to make sure the vasectomy worked, and no sperm could be detected.
But how badly did it hurt? The process itself didn’t hurt at all, thanks to the local anesthetic. The next-day soreness lingered for a couple of days. It was about 1/100th the pain of getting kicked in the nuts.
Since then, the fruits of my decision have been indescribably wonderful.
Men Who Have Vasectomies Have More Sex
A 2015 study by David Guo M.D., Remy Lamberts M.D., and Michael Eisenberg M.D. investigated the relationship between vasectomy and sexual frequency. The researchers analyzed the sex lives of 5,838 men and compared how much sex people were having in two groups — those with vasectomies and those without.
After the researchers controlled for age, race, marital status, education, health, BMI, children, and income — most of the factors that could inhibit sex — they found that men had an 81% chance of having sex at least once per week.
But the study didn’t end there.
5,211 women were included in the study, and researchers analyzed how often they had sex if their partners were vasectomized (versus nonvasectomized men). Women whose partners had vasectomies were 46% more likely to have sex at least once per week than women whose partners had no vasectomies.
No matter how you juggle the numbers, heterosexual couples have more sex when the man has a vasectomy.
I can’t even begin to tell you how wonderful it’s been for my sex life personally. Not to mention, women give you mad respect when you take this kind of initiative and show that you’re willing to take reproductive healthcare seriously.
I understand vasectomies aren’t an option for everybody, but if you’re certain you don’t want to have kids, it can seriously help your sex life.
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